Executive Overview
In the literary landscape of personal memoir, few works achieve the delicate balance of idiosyncratic humor, melancholic reflection, and structural intimacy found in Jane Gillette’s Old Friends: A Memoir. Published via The Missouri Review’s online-only prose anthology, BLAST—a digital platform dedicated to vibrant prose that defies the physical constraints of print journals—Gillette’s essay examines the intricate and often elusive construction of human relationships.
The narrative unfolds in the shadow of loss. Prompted by the 2018 death of her lifelong friend, Steve, and a subsequent memorial service that narrowly defined him through political activism and academic pedagogy, Gillette sets out to reclaim a different Steve. Her memoir serves as a profound meditation on how relationships transform across decades, geographical divides, and shifting marital landscapes. It challenges the sanitizing tendencies of public memorials by leaning into the fragmented, imperfect nature of human recollection.
Through a rich tapestry of memories—spanning clandestine academic committees in Washington, D.C. bars, midnight phone calls during marital crises, and surreal encounters involving international travel, missing pets, and whispered rumors of covert government work—Gillette constructs an evocative portrait of platonic intimacy. This article provides an in-depth examination of Gillette’s memoir, exploring its thematic architecture, the chronological evolution of its subjects, the cultural context of late-20th-century intellectual life in the nation’s capital, and the broader literary implications of memory as an act of preservation.
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Detailed Chronology: The Anatomy of a Decades-Long Friendship
The Academic Margins and "The Committee" (1970s–1980s)
The relationship between Jane Gillette and Steve—born in 1943 and 1945, respectively—began in the intellectual ferment of university life. Gillette, working as an adjunct professor of English while harboring deep skepticism toward formal literary criticism, found herself part of a Friday afternoon ritual known simply as "The Committee." Convening at The Tombs, a local Washington, D.C. establishment, the group initially comprised assistant professors across Classics, English, Philosophy, and Economics departments who would eventually ascend to tenured departmental governance.
For Gillette, however, this intellectual harbor was temporary. Disillusioned by the commodification of freshman English and the glass ceiling facing adjuncts who wrote short stories rather than academic theory, she eventually departed teaching. Yet, the social ecosystem of The Committee persisted and mutated. During the height of the anti-apartheid student protests—when campus shanty towns led to high-stakes university negotiations—The Committee was co-opted into a formal, disguised Wednesday afternoon class on apartheid, led by a law professor.
It was within these intellectual circles that Gillette and Steve’s paths intertwined, though their connection initially remained part of a broader social matrix. Their shared proximity to political resistance was well-established; Steve and Gillette’s former husband had both engaged with the Vietnam War Moratorium efforts of 1970. While Gillette spent her days in the Library of Congress wrestling with her dissertation, the seeds of a profound, enduring rapport were silently taking root.
The Crucible of Marital Dissolution and Daily Dialogues
The true depth of Gillette and Steve’s friendship crystallized not amid academic politics, but through the crucible of personal transformation. Following Gillette’s relocation to the West Coast in 2000 and Steve’s marriage to Laura, their day-to-day interactions shifted, yet their foundational bond remained intact.
Before this geographical separation, the relationship deepened dramatically during successive marital breakdowns. When Steve’s first major marriage to Gaylord dissolved—prompted by domestic realignments and personal crises—Steve turned to Gillette as an anchor, calling her night after night. Similarly, when Gillette’s marriage ended, Steve provided a mirrored space of solace and strategic counsel.
Their conversations formed a sustained, decades-long literary and emotional salon. They debated canonical texts with the urgency of people mapping their own emotional survival—discussing works such as Stendhal’s The Charterhouse of Parma, Thomas Mann’s The Magic Mountain, and Gabriel García Márquez’s Love in the Time of Cholera. These dialogues bridged physical distances, sustained by Steve’s frequent transatlantic commutes to London and South Africa, and reinforced by practical advice, such as his patented formula for surviving long-haul flights: a glass of red wine, a glass of white wine, and immediate sleep.
Domestic Rituals, Excursions, and Unexpected Surprises
Gillette’s memoir charts a rich topography of shared experiences in Washington, D.C., and beyond. Their interactions oscillated between the mundane and the extraordinary:
- Culinary Staples: The backdrop of their shared dinners—ranging from formal gatherings of influential Washington figures to casual evenings with children—was frequently supplied by the Yenching Palace on Connecticut Avenue, a culinary fixture of their shared geography.
- Milestone Moments: Steve and Gillette met for lunch on November 9, 1989, to celebrate the finalization of Gillette’s divorce—coinciding historically with the fall of the Berlin Wall.
- Travels and Escapades: Their travels included a memorable weekend in Santa Fe, New Mexico, touring historic sites, visiting the Georgia O’Keeffe home, and experiencing El Santuario de Chimayo. Locally, their outings ranged from shepherding school children to theatrical screenings of Titanic to navigating the eccentricities of IKEA furniture shopping for political gatherings.
- Absurd Realities: The memoir embraces the inexplicable, such as an evening during President Clinton’s second inauguration when Steve and an associate named Carl arrived at Gillette’s home simply to change clothes—an incident compounded by rumors whispered at parties that Steve and Carl operated within the ranks of the Secret Service.
The Final Chapter and the Reckoning of Mortality
The narrative trajectory shifts toward inevitable grief when Steve is diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Initially misheard by Gillette as a less aggressive prostate diagnosis, the terminal reality soon set in. Despite Gillette’s impulse to travel and pay her final respects, logistical and emotional barriers intervened; Steve’s wife, Laura, advised against a visit as his health deteriorated.
Steve passed away on August 17, 2018. More than a year later, sitting through a memorial service that lionized his political activism and tax law pedagogy, Gillette recognized the chasm between public legacy and private intimacy. Her memoir became her corrective—a deliberate, written act of preservation for the Steve she knew.
Supporting Context & Metrics: The Literary Framework of BLAST
To fully appreciate Old Friends: A Memoir, one must contextualize its publication within The Missouri Review’s digital initiatives. BLAST, the journal’s online-only prose anthology, was engineered to house literary works that break conventional boundaries in style, tone, and vitality.
Key Publishing Metrics & Characteristics of BLAST Submissions:
- Digital Agility: Unlike traditional quarterly print runs, BLAST allows for immediate, unmediated engagement with essays, flash fiction, and narrative prose that prioritizes stylistic urgency.
- Thematic Scope: The anthology specifically targets writing that captures contemporary consciousness, personal vulnerability, and stylistic risk-taking.
- Authorial Pedigree: Jane Gillette brings significant literary weight to the platform. A recipient of both the Lawrence Foundation prize and an O. Henry prize, her short fiction has graced the pages of premier literary publications including the Hopkins Review, Antigonish Review, Michigan Quarterly Review, Virginia Quarterly Review, and The Missouri Review. Her published collection, The Trail of the Demon and Other Stories (Missouri Review Books, 2017), established her reputation for sharp character studies and psychological depth.
Official Statements & Critical Perspectives
While personal memoirs do not feature institutional press releases, the cultural and literary weight of Gillette’s work invites examination through the lens of critical reception regarding contemporary memoir writing and the ethics of memory.
In discussions surrounding the craft of personal essay writing, literary critics frequently emphasize the tension between objective history and subjective emotional truth—a tension Gillette directly addresses when her friend Vicky disputes the existence of the "fake" apartheid Committee class. Gillette’s response in the text is both humorous and philosophically resonant: "If it didn’t happen, why do I remember it?"
This sentiment underscores a core tenet of memoir: emotional fidelity often supersedes documentary precision. In assessing Steve’s dual identity—the public figure of political engagement versus the private confidant of nightly phone calls—cultural commentators note how Gillette’s essay acts as a vital counterweight to hagiography. It asserts that a life is measured not merely by professional achievements or public activism, but by the private architectures of care, shared reading lists, impromptu airport advice, and quiet solidarity during life’s most disorienting passages.
Future Outlook: The Enduring Relevance of the Personal Essay
As digital publishing platforms continue to evolve, spaces like The Missouri Review’s BLAST ensure that narrative non-fiction retains its immediacy and emotional resonance. Jane Gillette’s Old Friends: A Memoir points toward several emerging trends in contemporary literary arts:
- The Democratization of Intimacy: Readers increasingly seek out essays that dismantle polished public personas in favor of messy, authentic human connections. Gillette’s willingness to portray her subject with all his contradictions—secret lives, shifting romantic entanglements, and quirky domestic habits—sets a high standard for modern biographical essays.
- Memory as Preservation: In an era dominated by transient digital communication (texts, emails, ephemeral messaging), memoirs that meticulously reconstruct decades of land-line phone calls and face-to-face rituals serve as cultural artifacts of a slower, more deliberate era of human attachment.
- The Continuing Evolution of Jane Gillette’s Oeuvre: Building upon her established success in short fiction and her 2017 collection, Gillette’s foray into extended memoiristic prose demonstrates the porous boundary between fiction and creative non-fiction, signaling a fertile ground for future narrative explorations.
Ultimately, Gillette concludes her memoir with a poignant reflection on mortality and remembrance. Recognizing that she does not subscribe to traditional prayer, she reframes her act of writing as a secular liturgy—a textual invocation for an old friend who has crossed the final threshold, presumably busy forging new, improbable bonds in the hereafter.

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